For two days our class have been learning with Miss Smith how to show don't tell an emotion in our writing. We also learnt how to write in the third person that means you are not allowed to include yourself not even saying me, ahau, au, mine , me, my, us , we etc. I think I done well by describing how they felt. Next time i should make more of a cliff hanger.
If you can please comment to see what emotion the person is feeling.
Here is my story , you can read and listen .
“Smash smash smash” went the thought against his head . “Stomp stomp stomp” went the veranda under his feet as he clopped like a horse to his room. “Arghhhhhh” he shrieked as he threw his remote control car at the window with sweat running down his red cheeks “ what was he going to do to pay the damage...
Hope you Enjoy :)